Recently, My office mate and I engaged into an "intellectual" conversation. It was one of those "intellectual meetings" that we set as part of our daily de-stressing routine at work. We were discussing about love, particularly on the extent a person should love. It was because of the lyric of an OPM music we just heard which says, "Bakit labis kitang mahal..." roughly translated as 'Why do I love you too much...'
Just a disclaimer: It is possible that I may have misinterpreted the meaning of the song but my position on a love that is "too much" is more concerned on the distorted and often disordered view on love, a word, rather an emotion either simplified or exaggerated too much.
I thought the word 'too much' to describe a love for a person is disordered. What I have in mind are the people who became too obsessed about a person and may even become destructive just because he/she loves a person too much. Too much love will kill you, remember what the Queen told us?
My office mate believes that you can't put a limit to love, and there is not an easy way for you to say that you you are already loving too much; and love is an all encompassing term that can never be defined in a single word, and I agree.
We were arguing about this topic when she brought out a book she's been into entitled "Love Triangle" written by a psychologist, Robert Sternberg. Sternberg theorizes a model of love which is represented in a triangle of elements, namely Intimacy, Passion and Commitment. He said that a consummate love must have all three elements, otherwise it may just be infatuation, a mere liking or an empty commitment. It was a good model, I thought. Scholarly indeed!
What followed was a realization on how the world is frivolously trying to live life yet wasting it and pondering on its deepest questions but eluding to find the answer while it is just, obviously there. People would offer the best philosophies and most erudite scientific explanations on how to better appreciate life or experience, in this case, love but fails to acknowledge the source of love.
Okay, okay... Sternberg is speaking to all people regardless of religion and he never have to mention God in his theory.
And that is the problem with so many people. They thought they can talk about God only in a particular times and venues and not talk about work, or talk about work without having to talk about God. A disordered view on God. Splitting the spiritual and the corporal.
Can you sever your soul from your body?
Ah, love! A many splendored thing indeed!